So occasionally I get hit in the face with life.
Not necessarily a bad thing at all.
Just in a "Hey you, this is your life" sort of way.
Sometimes a feel the gravity of my life decisions in thee. stupidest. ways. ever.
Example for your entertainment and delight:
Yesterday I was brushing my teeth and my internal monologue went something like
"Hmm toothpaste is low. Better buy more today. Oh wait! Last time it was on sale I bought like 4 and they're under the sink. Sweet. Good on ya......
.....Shit, I'm old."
I told Eric and it made him laugh. How does toothpaste make you feel old?! Seriously.
I just kinda stared at the tube for a second and was like, "....I bought that. And I had the presence of mind to buy a few to spare myself a future trip at a higher price. I'm. OLD."
Sometimes it sinks in. I'm, ya know, growed up and stuff. Eric and I get excited over things like putting new tires on the truck (also done yesterday--we were stoked) and Greek yogurt going on sale. I've turned into a grocery shopping savant of sorts in that I remember the cost of EVERYTHING. Not sure when it happened and it blows husband's mind. But I figure, in my current role as stay at home wife-almost-mom, it's kinda my job--know silly facts like the cost of eggs so to better manage the money in the house.
And eggs are currently $1.79 a dozen at our Trader Joes. In case you were worried.
I remember a few years ago when we were dating, I bought Eric an iPod for his 19th(!) birthday. It was one of the biggest purchases I'd made to date, aside from my car . Soooo many decisions about which model to buy and how much. Kinda makes me want to go back and hug sweet little 19 year old me and say, "Yeah, imagine house hunting, kid." What a difference a few years make.
I's old. Or just so much older than I used to be a couple short years ago. If that makes sense.
But all in all, it's usually after our conversations (usually over grocery shopping) about savings and meal planning and which laundry soap is it that doesn't irritate his skin?, and strategically planning major purchases that we look at each other and one or both of us says, "I like our life."
And I do. I'm happy. So much happier than I thought I could be. It's a sweet moment when you realize that everything you ever wanted is here and it's now--that sweet 16 year old boy I had a crush on turned out to be a hell of a husband, our baby girl will be here any day, and our little home has come to life. Wonderful, chaotic, laughter filled, occasionally monotonous, mostly exciting life.
Sometimes I feel old. But then I realize--I kinda like getting older.